Sacha Kljestan Just Wants to Be Me (or is it the Other Way Around)
A lot of you may not know this but Sacha Kljestan bites my style all the time. Dude is like a mini-me. Except that he's tall, white, handsome, athletic, drives a nice sports car, is on the cover of a video game and sleeps with a model. Other than that we are exactly alike.
Dude even bites my celebrity photos. Not only did I get snapped with Aziz Ansari years ago (and in Vegas damnit) but I had the whole cast of Human Giant in my picture, fam! This was way before he was on Parks & Rec and he hadn't even been shot by Justin Beiber yet! I'm telling you the kid is all up on me like sweat in the summer.
Or not. I'm a deeply paranoid person and he more than likely has no idea I exist so I could be wrong about all of this. I'll tell you one thing though...if you see him rocking a fierce set of moobs while strapped with a hideously colored, automatic Nerf rifle you know who did it first. Just saying.