American Soccer Fans: The Original "Birthers"
You know those people that ignore Barack Obama's birth announcement in the Honolulu Advertiser back in the 60's and think that his birth certificate was faked and that he was born in Kenya, Indonesia, Kerplakistan or anyplace else? The "Birthers"? In addition to calling them delusional I think they should be called "biters" because more than a few soccer fans have already played that game with an American of African extraction.
Remember the good old days when people would debate the validity of Freddy Adu's birth certificate? Dudes would hit the message board of their choice and type 'til their fingers bled debating whether or not the The Biggest Midget in the Game™ was actually a child prodigy or an O.D.B. courting trouble by messing with jail-bait named JoJo. I thought those days were over. I was wrong.
Today Marc Zeigler of the San Diego Union-Tribune, one of my favorite soccer writers, has turned the clock back to those heady days of 2004 by dropping a little something entitled "A Birth Certificate Worth Questioning" in which he proposes that the kid is the sporting equivalent of that cougar you met in the hotel bar in Scottsdale; she's got the age she tells you she is, and the age her Fleetwood Mac tattoo tells you she is.
Hey, are those helicopters I hear? And why is David Duchovny running towards me?