Marc Burch Gets in Touch with His Inner Kutcher


You know how some people get all paranoid about their luggage when they fly and get their bags wrapped in up like mummy's in the airport? Marc Burch kinda decided that he need to do that to Santino Quaranta's car the other day for some inexplicable reason. Behind the Badge can explain the whole thing a bit better than I can.

I will say that I do appreciate this kind of prank; no one get's hurt and the damage to personal property is minimal. If you're reading this Santino --and let's face it you're not-- I have a suggestion for revenge...Liquid Ass.

Now before you assume that Liquid Ass is a condition resulting from an evening spent at a dodgy taqueria let me set you straight. Liquid Ass is a "super–concentrated liquid that evaporates, filling the air with a genuine, foul butt–crack smell with hints of dead animal and fresh poo." Sounds yummy doesn't it? Perhaps replacing Mr. Burch's gym bag with one marinated in this fine concoction would be appropriate retribution? Or perhaps replacing his shower gel or hand sanitizer with something more "aromatic"? You have to admit it beats toilet papering his house.

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